reflections
of course, today is the 4th anniversary of the terror attacks of 2001.
i won't get into the effects that that day had on me. there is simply not enough time or space here. but, i do want to offer up this:
i have flown every year on september 11th since 2002. i never once have had an issue with this. (my mother, on the other hand, freaks out every time.) well, today was no different. this morning, i flew to louisville for another week of bank-related fun. but, this day, i flew to louisville through charlotte, NC.
the reason this is important is that when you fly from boston to charlotte (and sit on the right side of the plane as i often do) you are afforded some spectacular views of just about every major city along the eastern seaboard. including new york and washington d.c.
so, as i sat in logan, fully aware of the secret acts that took place there 4 years ago, i checked my watch at 8:45 am. and again at 9:03. i did my moment of silence. no big deal.
i got on the plane and quickly nodded off as usual. shortly into the flight, i opened my eyes and looked out the window. "oh, it's new york," i thought. then, with over the rhine's "give me strength" coming through my headphones, the date screamed into my head again. so i stared at the still gaping hole in the financial district as we cruised by, reailzed the irony...and then i lost it. i teared up right there as the lower tip of manhattan slowly forced it's way too far to my left for me to see it any more through my tiny window. i regained myself (fortunately, there was no one next to me, that would have been interesting) and continued to watch the passing cityscapes on this glorious morning. philadelphia. then baltimore....then d.c. jarred again, i focused on the pentagon and the tears came back.
all this to say, that unplanned, i had my own full-scale eyewitness connection to today's remembrance in just under 30 minutes. viewing these beautiful cities from the air took me back to the eerie awfulness of that day. i don't know if it was good, but it was strangely necessary.
that's it.
i won't get into the effects that that day had on me. there is simply not enough time or space here. but, i do want to offer up this:
i have flown every year on september 11th since 2002. i never once have had an issue with this. (my mother, on the other hand, freaks out every time.) well, today was no different. this morning, i flew to louisville for another week of bank-related fun. but, this day, i flew to louisville through charlotte, NC.
the reason this is important is that when you fly from boston to charlotte (and sit on the right side of the plane as i often do) you are afforded some spectacular views of just about every major city along the eastern seaboard. including new york and washington d.c.
so, as i sat in logan, fully aware of the secret acts that took place there 4 years ago, i checked my watch at 8:45 am. and again at 9:03. i did my moment of silence. no big deal.
i got on the plane and quickly nodded off as usual. shortly into the flight, i opened my eyes and looked out the window. "oh, it's new york," i thought. then, with over the rhine's "give me strength" coming through my headphones, the date screamed into my head again. so i stared at the still gaping hole in the financial district as we cruised by, reailzed the irony...and then i lost it. i teared up right there as the lower tip of manhattan slowly forced it's way too far to my left for me to see it any more through my tiny window. i regained myself (fortunately, there was no one next to me, that would have been interesting) and continued to watch the passing cityscapes on this glorious morning. philadelphia. then baltimore....then d.c. jarred again, i focused on the pentagon and the tears came back.
all this to say, that unplanned, i had my own full-scale eyewitness connection to today's remembrance in just under 30 minutes. viewing these beautiful cities from the air took me back to the eerie awfulness of that day. i don't know if it was good, but it was strangely necessary.
that's it.
posted by cade at 2:49 PM
6 Comments:
i had just finished my summer directing Wild Oak. i was living in one of the little shanties at the old Horse Ranch (now WO) and had slept in.
it was still warm and the shanti heated up as the sun climbed above the Redwoods and Pines.
the heat woke me up and as i got dressed i tuned the radio to NPR.
"the tower is burning, there are reports... oh no.. oh my god..."
the second plane struck.
i couldn't understand what was happening. i first thought they were describing something from a movie, then maybe something anywere else but here.
when i finally understood what was occuring i sat stunned.
i went over to Mike Peoples house and his wife Kat was watching cnn.
i walked in just in time to see the first then second tower colapse.
that is where i was when our world changed.
today, each year, people's vision is compromised by the steady invasion of painful tears...I make sure I have plenty of tissue, if you need some, come on over...
I knew there was a great, big heart under there, Bun.
Thank you for sharing.
this post was heartbreakingly beautiful.
i feel kind of funny saying that, but there you go.
Thanks for exposing your heart so that the rest of us can feel brave enough to do so.
thanks for sharing that and for being available to the recuring pain of re-visited tragedy.
may we all see as you saw in that flight.
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